Confession of a Panic–Overthinker Admin

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I’ve been an admin for two years now, and let me tell you — it’s not the “easy paperwork” job people think it is.

We’re basically the office’s human glue — holding together schedules, bookings, payments, follow-ups, random “urgent” requests, and the occasional “Can you just…?” (which is never just).

The thing is, my admin style isn’t the colour-coded, perfectly labelled, ultra-organised kind you see on Pinterest. I’m more of a “panicked but somehow it gets done” kind of admin. I can handle the workload, but I know I need a better system — for me, and for the poor souls who rely on me.

The hardest part? This role requires you to remember everything. And I mean everything. You’re the walking “to-do” list of the company. But one small miss, and suddenly you’re starring in a workplace drama you never auditioned for.

I get so jealous of naturally organised people who seem to just… know what to do next. Meanwhile, I’m here overthinking the overthinking.

Still, I’ve learned to respect this role (and myself in it) more than ever. Admins aren’t “just admin.” We’re problem-spotters, fixers, time-keepers, chaos-containers. And even if the work is invisible most of the time, it’s the reason the wheels keep turning.

So here’s to the admins — whether you’re a neat freak or a last-minute miracle worker like me — because without us, the whole thing falls apart.




Weight Loss Update: From 89kg to 86kg Without Starving or Struggling

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Hey everyone 👋
Just wanted to give a little update on my weight journey.

The last time I talked about this was back in February 2025, when I posted “Stuck at 89kg: Time to Break the Cycle.”
Honestly… I didn’t do anything after that post. Maybe I just needed to get those thoughts off my chest.

Since then, my weight stayed around 89kg — until recently.

And surprisingly, the change started from one random question I asked ChatGPT. I was supposed to get a weight loss plan (which I didn’t even follow 😅)… but somehow that turned into me tracking all my meals.

On 1st July 2025, I started logging everything I ate — from breakfast to dinner. ChatGPT estimated the calories and gave little comments on my food choices. Over time, I began making small swaps:

  • Fried → grilled or stir-fried

  • Less kuah in my meals

  • More veggies and lean protein

  • Less rice & processed sauces

  • Added more fruits

  • Slowly reduced sugar from “less sugar” to “no sugar”

Now, here’s the part I never thought I could do — cutting down on rice. I LOVE RICE. RICE IS LIFE. The idea of eating less made me unhappy at first. And no kuah? Even worse! I thought I couldn’t eat “dry” rice.

But after trying, it wasn’t bad at all. A plate full of veggies and protein actually kept me satisfied — even with half the usual rice. And the rice wasn’t truly “dry” anyway… there’s still the essence of kuah from your lauk and veg, just in a smaller portion. It just took time to adjust, and I didn’t go 100% clean from day one. That’s my biggest tip: start small, change gradually, and don’t be too hard on yourself.

Tracking gave me a huge awareness of my calorie intake — and honestly, it’s crazy. Some small, innocent-looking snacks are calorie bombs. Example: jemput-jemput. Just 5 pieces = 200+ calories! That’s enough to push you over your daily limit without realising it.

Even eating out is different now. At the local kedai tomyum, I used to order nasi pad khaprao. But after learning how much oil, sauce, and sugar it has, I switched to nasi putih with ayam goreng kunyit — cleaner and more balanced.

🎉 The Result?
I’ve lost 3kg in a month — without starving, over-exercising, or obsessing.
I’m now 86kg, and the best part?
It didn’t feel like a punishment.

Just awareness, small swaps, and consistent tracking.

To anyone feeling stuck:
You don’t need to go hardcore to make progress.
Sometimes all it takes is one small step — and a little accountability.

Here’s to better habits, one meal at a time 🥗💪
I’ll share more next time!

When Silence Feels Like Betrayal: A Reflection on Palestine, Faith, and Humanity

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Today, I feel called to write this—not because I have answers, but because staying silent feels like betrayal.

When it comes to the conflict between Palestine and Israel, I’ve always stood with my Palestinian brothers and sisters. Before I am even a human being, I am their family through our shared religion—we believe in the same Prophet, the same God, the same faith.

But that doesn’t mean I blindly support everything done in their name. I do not support extremism or acts of violence that go against what our religion teaches. Islam never permits injustice—even when we are the victims of it.


A Narrative That Never Felt Right

Every time I hear Israel’s narrative—videos claiming they're “defending themselves,” footage of them being “attacked”—something always feels off. We’ve seen too much to take these stories at face value.

From the beginning, we were told the truth.
We’ve lived it, witnessed it, felt it.
And that’s what keeps me grounded. Unshaken.


Gaza Today: A Humanitarian Nightmare

The current situation in Gaza is unbearable.

  • Famine.

  • Starvation.

  • Children dying—not just from bombs, but now from hunger.

  • Parents watching their children slowly wither.

  • Elders waiting silently for death.

All because of a blockade on food, water, and humanitarian aid.

They’re not just being killed—they're being erased.
Punished simply for surviving.

Scroll through social media and you’ll see: Palestinians are no longer just running from bombs—they’re fighting to survive starvation. Skin clinging to bone. Eyes filled with fear and sorrow. Homes turned to rubble. Lives shattered beyond repair.

There is no safe place left in their own land.


This Isn’t 1945

So why are we still seeing:

  • Mass killings?

  • Starvation used as a weapon of war?

  • Blockades on life itself?

I’m exhausted. I’ve cried until I couldn’t anymore.
But even then, I can’t begin to imagine what they’re going through.

They are the ones living the nightmare.
They are the ones crying for help.
And in the end—many are silenced.
Some by fear. Others forever.


75 Years of Injustice

75 years.
An endless cycle.
Nothing has changed. In fact—it’s only gotten worse.

Meanwhile, the other side watches like it’s some kind of twisted version of The Hunger Games. Enjoying the power. The privileges. The support. Celebrating others’ suffering in the name of "self-defense."

They keep repeating the same words:
"Hamas." "Hostages." "Terrorists."

But let’s be honest: they don’t care. Not about truth. Not about peace.

So I start to wonder:
What gives Israel such confidence in their actions?
Why is there no guilt? No shame? No humanity?


Faith, or Justification for Cruelty?

I’ve seen how they mock Palestinian suffering. How they dehumanize them. Call them animals. Destroy homes. Kill for sport.

Why?
What belief allows this?

Then I turn inward.

What makes me so certain in supporting Palestine?
What roots my belief?

I realize—it’s belief too.
But not belief in superiority.
Belief in justice. In mercy. In compassion.

Their belief tells them the land is promised. That they are the “chosen people.” That their actions are part of a divine plan.

But I ask:
What kind of “chosen people” kill the innocent?
What kind of divine promise involves bloodshed and cruelty?

Our Prophets—Musa (Moses), Isa (Jesus), and Muhammad (peace be upon them)—were also chosen by God.

But they didn’t mock pain.
They didn’t massacre families.
They didn’t turn compassion into conquest.

They stood against oppression.
They taught mercy.
They reminded us to see humanity even in our enemies.

No Prophet mocked suffering.
No Prophet ignored injustice.
And no truly chosen people would do the opposite of God’s mercy.

So again I ask:
What kind of faith allows this?


The Word Is: Evil

  • Evil is intentional harm.

  • Evil is knowing you’re hurting others—and doing it anyway.

  • Evil is cruelty without guilt.

But sometimes, what’s even more evil are the bystanders.

The ones who close their eyes.
The ones who stay silent.
The ones who justify it—after seeing children buried under rubble, elders crying out, entire families wiped out.

And still, they say:
"They deserved it."

Because they defended their home?
Because they wanted freedom?
Because they refused to vanish?

What kind of logic is that?
What kind of human thinks like that?


When Humans Become More Terrifying Than the Devil

In 2024 and 2025, I feel blessed to see more people waking up. Social media became a powerful tool for truth. People began to see behind the curtain. Israel's actions exposed their true colors.

And yet—some still refuse to acknowledge it.

It made me realize:
Some humans are more terrifying than the devil himself.

They live in their own world. Ruling with power, manipulating truth, playing God.

You see, Shaytan was cast out for refusing to bow to Adam. His mission is to mislead. To whisper.

But even Shaytan never spilled innocent blood.

We did.

For years, we’ve killed.
We’ve destroyed.
We’ve broken what we were meant to protect—each other, this earth, the sacredness of life.

And for what?
Power? Land? Pride?

We were created with hearts, with mercy, with minds.
But when we abandon those—we become worse than what we were warned against.


This Is Bigger Than Palestine

This isn’t just about Palestine.
It’s about who we are becoming when we let this happen.

When we watch.
When we stay silent.
When we justify the unjustifiable.

Evil isn’t only the one who pulls the trigger.
Evil is also the one who looks away.

Life is a temporary vacation.
But the afterlife is permanent.

One day, we’ll be held accountable—for what we chose to see, and what we chose to ignore.