Love feels simple until it isn’t. Until it asks more than just your heart. Until it asks for patience, wisdom, and sometimes sacrifice. I’ve been watching someone I care about navigate love - passionately, fearlessly, but also in ways that made me pause and reflect. It made me think: what does it really mean to love wisely?
I know a girl whose life seems to revolve around love. She desires it deeply, almost desperately, while I find myself craving it in a quieter, steadier way. Watching her journey, I’ve learned something important: love is not just a feeling. It’s also a test, a responsibility, and sometimes, a crossroads between your heart and your values.
She often dives headfirst into relationships, mostly with men she meets online. She gives herself fully - her trust, her hope, her dreams. Even when red flags appear, she holds on to the idea of love, dreaming of marriage, believing in the best in people.
Now, she’s seeing someone new - a Christian man she’s known for only two months. She says he’s a good man, better than the one before, and she speaks of marriage again. “We’ll take it slow,” she says. “If it’s meant to be, we’ll end up together.”
It’s beautiful, in a way. But it also worries me. He doesn’t seem interested in converting, and in Islam, marriage is more than love. It’s faith, leadership, and shared values. A household is guided spiritually by the husband, and if he isn’t prepared or willing, it can create challenges no amount of love can overcome.
I’ve tried to gently remind her: love alone isn’t always enough. Conversion for love, rather than faith, can be a heavy test. Feelings may guide you, but actions - especially those with lifelong consequences - need wisdom and care.
She reminds me, though, not to judge: “In Allah’s mercy, people change. As long as we have faith, there’s hope.” She’s right. Hope is powerful. Mercy is endless. But even hope should not blind us to reality. Protecting your heart and your faith doesn’t mean denying love - it means respecting the life you’ve been given and the path you walk.
Love is a gift, and so are feelings. But feelings are fleeting. The decisions we make in their name can last a lifetime. Marriage can be beautiful - a fairy tale, even - but it is also hard work, responsibility, and sometimes sacrifice. Marrying purely for love, without alignment in faith and values, is a risk that few notice until it’s too late.
Watching her, I’ve realized: love is not about surrendering yourself entirely. It’s about guarding your heart, being patient, and letting faith guide your choices. Love doesn’t have to be reckless. It can be wise, steady, and still beautiful.
Sometimes, the bravest thing we can do in love is wait. To trust that what is meant for us will come, guided not only by our hearts but by wisdom, faith, and clarity. Protect your heart, nurture it, and love - but wisely. Because love, when paired with patience and faith, becomes something enduring, sacred, and truly worth giving.
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