When Did I Become the Scolding Aunt?

Just a random post today. I was talking to my sister the other day about her kids and how they seem to dislike me compared to my other sibling. She finds it weird because, back in the day, most kids liked the younger me. I was like, “Huh… maybe it’s because I always scold your naughty kids, while others don’t.” That’s the only answer I could think of at the time.

A few days later, I was lying down, thinking about that conversation and wondering why I had changed. I don’t get angry easily, but I’ve found myself doing so more lately. There was one time I scolded my niece for licking a table at a restaurant. I was like, “Eww, no! Don’t do that, it’s dirty!!” She looked at me, but with these scared eyes. I was stunned for a second, thinking, I’m not mad at you; I’m mad at what you did, but I didn’t say anything. I just kept looking at her. She somehow reminded me of my younger days.

But why have I become like this? I’ve become more sensitive, and I’ve changed over time. That’s when I realized our different points of view might be the reason. When I was a kid, I always wondered why my mom always scolded me. I thought she didn’t understand me and was always complaining about things I did. My mom was a fierce person — or at least, that’s what I always told everyone. But it hit me.

Maybe my mom wasn’t naturally a fierce person. Maybe my siblings and I made her that way because of our uncontrollable, mischievous behavior. I've slowly come to understand her perspective. Spending time with kids really tests your patience and limits. They often don’t listen the first time. They may not care if you speak nicely. If they’re overly happy, they might not be aware of their surroundings. And they can become spoiled if given everything without learning any lessons. Not to mention, when combined with our own existing problems, it can be truly overwhelming, especially when the kids don’t want to cooperate.

For kids, everything is a learning process and a big playground. We always find ways to explore our creativity in unexpected places or with things we come across. We let impulsive thoughts take over. We’re only looking for fun, and that lack of awareness can give some adults a heart attack.

I get it now. The reason my younger self was more likeable to kids was that I was one of them. Now that I’ve grown up, my perspective has changed. I’m more focused on my surroundings and more alert to their behavior. I guess time has changed, and so have I.